I Remember (Part 1)

I remember how I woke up that morning. The sound of the birds chirping at my window, the heavy wind that made the anticipation of rain high, the sweet smell of sand awaiting the drop of rain. God knows I didn't want to get up from bed but my mum’s voice, piercing through my door made me jump from my bed like I was late for an appointment. 

I remember how she told me she hadn't heard from my aunty in weeks and she wanted me to check on her when I got to town. My parents live in an outskirt of the federal capital. We would always have to travel for 30 mins before we approach first sign that says "Welcome to Abuja" . It was a long drive I hated and for some reason beyond my comprehension, I dreaded it more on this day. 

I remember getting into my car and feeling very weak. My spirit and body where ganging up against me, but i am a young woman trying to make a living by being an entrepreneur; I didn't have the choice to pick what days I go about doing my business. If only I had listened to my gut feeling, if only I had just stayed home, today wouldn't have been a horrible day. 

I remember having my two meetings and feeling very drained. I almost said to myself I wasn't going to see my aunty. "I tried but traffic was crazy" was what I was going to tell my mum when she asked. Then I remembered, I remembered how my mum looked at me when she asked me to check on her sister. I remembered how she sounded so scared, I almost asked why she sounded like that but I had a long day ahead and I was not in for any family gossip.

I remember how I reluctantly drove to my aunty's house. I sat in the car for 10 minutes before I proceeded to her front door. I knocked but no one answered. I pulled out my phone from my bag, typed in her name and called her. I could hear the phone ringing from the small window by the door but there was no answer. This was when I got scared, my first instinct was to call the gateman and ask him questions but he wasn't at his quarters. I had a strange feeling. I went to the backyard and found it open, I was skeptical about entering but I did anyway. 

I remember the first smell I perceived when I entered, it smelled like food was going bad in the refrigerator. I know my aunty too well to know that she never lets food spoil. I walked through the kitchen and up the stairs, screaming my aunties name at every step; no response. I got to her bedroom door and at that point I knew what was behind that door would scar me for life. 

I remember weighing my options. "Should I call my mum or not? Even if I call her what would I say is the problem when I haven't opened the door?" This is when I decided to open the door. My hands pushed the door open while remaining in the stance position I took. I could not comprehend what my eyes had discovered. I couldn't move neither could I speak. I thought of how many reasons I had not to be here today and the one reason that made me change my mind. Now I'm faced with a bartered faced woman who I hardly recognised as my aunty. At first glance I thought she was dead and I began to move towards her. Then I noticed her hand move, this is when I found my voice. This is when I began to scream. Neighbours broke the front door and rushed to me. The saw my aunty lying lifeless on the floor. They kept screaming words at me but I couldn’t make out what they were saying because I was in shock. Three men carried her down the stairs and put her at the back seat of my car. We drove quietly to the hospital. When she was admitted I called my mum.

I remember my mum just shouting”Jesus Jesus Jesus Jesus Jesus”. Within the next hour she was with me at the hospital. My mum stayed over by her sisters side while I returned home to tell my dad the ordeal I had been through. I got home, packed my car and sat in it for like 20 minutes. When I finally got the courage to enter the house I saw a call from my mum. My aunty had died. I felt my knee go weak. The next thing I remember was that I woke up on the coach in my house. My dad had found me unconscious by the door of my car. I couldn’t believe she passed. I can’t believe I found her like that. I can’t believe the last time I saw my aunty was at her weakest moment. She died and we didn’t even know what happened. I was broken. I am still broken.